Rectober No. 4 - And so Death Took...

[nia_kantorka]

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This rec post isn’t about the light and fluffy fics. It’s about the mighty ones. The ones which are able to shatter your heart, to let tears roll down your face, to make you uncomfortable, to let you sigh deeply, and the ones you can only read in fractions or when you are in a special mood.

Title: Stop All the Clocks (This is the Last Time I’m Leaving Without You)
Author/Artist: firethesound
Pairing(s) Harry/Draco, Hermione/Ron, Harry/OMC
Rating: NC-17
Word Count: 44.706
Warnings: Death, Character Death, Grief/Mourning, Angst and Humour, Auror Partners, Rimming, Drunk Sex, Moving On, Bottom!Harry, Top!Draco, Switching

Summary: Living with Draco was difficult; living without him is unbearable. But if there’s one thing Harry learned from the war, it’s that even when one life ends, the rest of the world goes right on living.

Why I loved it:
This fic. It was terribly hard to read, this fic. Even for me who can enjoy even the hard and dark topics as long there is love woven in between. And it is. There is so much love in Stop All the Clocks… it nearly lets you drown. Because it makes Harry’s loss so much bigger and nearly unbearable for the reader too.
The two timelines in which firethesound told the story were an idea of pure genius. In one we meet Harry and Draco being drunk on one of these official Ministry parties, both are annoyed and angry and just fuck each other. That’s where their relationship starts. The other timeline starts with Darco already being dead. Yes, he is dead. And nothing will change this. Harry is nearly losing his mind over this loss. And when their relationship starts to grow, Harry is dealing with the different stages of grieving. When they become a happy couple, he tries to leave England and all his memories behind. When their Auror work becomes more and more dangerous, Harry comes back and gets obsessed over a ghostly copy of Draco’s last memories and – inevitably – Draco is going to die and Harry – after years of mourning – finally starts to heal.

You know, I’m sitting here thinking about it and my eyes get teary again. Yes, that’s what makes this story so wonderful. It makes you feel it all: the good and the bad, the love and the loss, the lively characters and the death or emotional shutdown. You might cry reading this story but it will touch you for real.

Excerpt:
Inhale.

They do it the same way every time, Draco inside Harry. It’s certainly not fucking, and it’s not quite making love. In fact, Harry barely thinks of it as sex at all. It’s just good morning, slow and warm and sleepy, rocking together, orgasm almost an afterthought. And while it’s not new or fresh or exciting, it’s comfortable and familiar. Like a cup of tea on a cold day, or Harry’s old Weasley jumper that Draco’s constantly threatening to throw out. And somehow that’s even better.

Inhale.

And when they finish, every time, every single time, Draco says, “I could get used to waking up like this,” like he hasn’t been waking up like this for five years now. And a smile spreads over his face, as slow and warm as a pat of butter melting on a hot slice of toast. And Harry kisses him then, and knows that whatever else this day might bring, it will be all right because tomorrow he’ll be right back here with Draco in his arms.

Inhale.

Harry opens his eyes.

Title: The Next Twenty-Four Hours
Author/Artist: saras_girl
Pairing(s) Harry/Draco
Rating: R
Word Count: 3.376
Warnings: Character Death
Summary: In twenty-four hours, the Ministry will take your life. Until then, I’m all yours.

Why I loved it:
What can I say? I adore every word and every story of Sara’s Girl and this fic is no exception- even though it’s not funny or sweet or fluffy. Harry bares his soul to the reader about losing Draco in twenty-four hours. And it’s horrible to see them both suffering through and clinging to every minute. It is heaven and hell in one story: hard, touching, rough, cruel and beautiful. Yes, I love it. And I re-read every once in a while. That’s my way of reminding me to not take everything – love, happiness, even life – for granted.

Excerpt:
I whisper your name because my skin is warm, salty-wet now and I want you to look at me, but you won’t. You shake your head against mine and push hard into me, shattering this slow ache and I clamp down around you, crying out, shooting hot, wet ropes across our skin and drawing you closer, holding you in place, and I say the words out loud this time, I know I do.

I love you.

You hear them, grip my hands hard enough to hurt and come with a rough sob. “Harry,” you whisper, and it’s the first time. And the last.

When you throw an arm over me and close your eyes, I know you’re pretending to be asleep, and I let you. I say all the things I wish I could say to you when you’re awake, and you pretend not to hear them. Your slow, warm breath skates over my wrist as I play with your hair, and I wonder if I’ll cry for you when you aren’t here to mock me.

Title: Enemy of My Enemy
Author/Artist: penwyn
Pairing(s) Harry/Draco
Rating: NC-17
Word Count: 8.019
Warnings: Character Deaths, Eating disorder

Summary: Unable to cope with the hardships of war, Draco Malfoy elects to starve himself to death. Starving yourself isn't that easy, however, when you suddenly find something to live for.

Why I loved it:
This story has the best and saddest last sentence I’ve ever read. And yes, its deaths here- so be prepared. Enemy of My Enemy has a Draco with a great voice. He is so in character but changes, not much, but enough for Harry to fall for him, and that is beautifully to see. It is a tough read and I’m never sure whose end is more terrible. But every time I re-read this story, I’m in awe.

Excerpt:
Harry told Draco that there was one final Horcrux, a secret, and Draco never even thought to question him about it. It never occurred to him that the look in Harry’s eyes after every time they fooled around could have been anything but satiation. He never put a second thought as to why Harry always held onto him just a little longer than was necessary, thinking that Harry just craved physical contact. Draco never minded the prolonged embraces, the hand-holding, or the sudden, desperate pawing in bed.

In really need to stop here. Re-reading parts of Stop All the Clocks and then the two shorter fics- too much sadness... So, I’m out of here and re-reading something light and fluffy now.

Comments

[nia_kantorka]

Oh, thank you. And you are welcome. I'm glad you could take a glimpse and know it's just not for you.

Because if one can't, one just shouldn't read them. These stories should make one feel heart-wrenching sad but in a good way. Where you can admire the beauty even if you are crying tears.

So, don't force yourself into reading them. *hugs*